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Graduation for many is meant to be a time for everyone to get together and celebrate the end of three or four years of hard work. It is a time for parents to all get together and share stories about their loved ones and embrace the success of their children. It is up there in our lives (for those who partake in uni) with eighteenth birthday celebrations, marriage and the birth of our first little rugrat.

However...

Due to the "current economic climate" and the manner in which universities across the entire United Kingdom are now run and managed, it seems as though the soul and importance of graduation has been lost on the higher echelons of the establishments management. I use the term "management" because even on a day like my recent graduation ceremony, it seems that the opportunity to upsell the university to parents blinded by pride and emotion had not fallen on deaf ears.

It seems as though proud parents + big wallets = marketing opportunity too good to miss out on. I did an arts degree and it was clear to me that kind of algebra was tattooed across the congregation hall.

Now I understand that universities are in a position with unbelievable amounts of financial strain put on them by the government but why go head first at student's graduation ceremonies and blindly shake the charity bucket in their faces. We are all well-educated young people and realise what you are doing, there is no need.

At our recent graduation ceremony, there was a sense of achievement and raptuous appreciation for all the other students on our course who we have sat next to, copied notes off and fretted over deadlines and dissertations for the past three years. It was to be a day of gratitude and fun. It was until the dreaded sales pitch.

The pro-vice chancellor stood tall in front of two hundred recent history graduates and promptly read from the autocue that was pushed out in front of him, like the budget report. Unwaivering he promptly sold Newcastle to us. I say "us" our parents, siblings and family friends who may well no someone who is considering which university to choose. It was a poor man's Glengarry Glen Ross.

10% off a Master's Degree if we chose to do it at Newcastle. The job market is difficult at the moment for us but luckily Newcastle will be there to support us if we join the alumni association for a nominal fee. There are many improvements and announced new buildings for just after we have left - great that'll be useful.

Then the denouement of the piece: we (two hundred odd history graduates and our parents) were told that Newcastle was in the top ten for medicine, architecture and law in the country.

This chap had not read the script. He had misjudged the crowd worse than Tony Hayward speaking at the annual crayfish convention in Louisiana.

Come on people let's put the commission fee aside for a day, wheel away the merchandise table. We are twenty-two year olds, no-one in their right mind is going to buy a baby grow with Newcastle University emblazoned across it.

These are university lecturers, put some thought into it and go for subliminal messaging or something. You have already told us how much cash you have parted with in developing the science departments. Put it into practice.